Humor

32 Gifts For Dog Lovers Who Basically Hate Humans

32 Gifts For Dog Lovers Who Basically Hate Humans

Written By Meredith Kavanagh

Dec 8, 2016

Dog lovers are some of the best people on the planet. We’re loving — we share our beds, food, and time with a needy, furry baby. We love to play — we snuggle, roughhouse, and go to parks 24/7.

And dammit, if you’re willing to wake up at 5 a.m. and pick up someone’s poop every day, you’ve got to be a decent human! So while you’re shopping for the holidays, check out these adorably unique gifts for dog lovers and dog gifts for the canine-obsessed human in your life.

Side note: if you’re more of a loner when it comes to people, that’s okay. It’s completely fine to love dogs more than people. We get it. In fact, some of us here at DogPack completely agree. We won’t judge if you buy all of these items for yourself.

Keep reading to check out some of the coolest things available for you and your numero uno — but be warned: you’re going to want to buy everything.

Gifts For Dog Lovers

1. This shirt is a get-out-of-brunch-free card. 

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If you’re tired of dealing with people who want to distract you with pointless things like weddings and birthdays, wear this shirt. Bask in the glow of telling it like it is — and let the cotton do the talking.

2. Art that answers the question: "Are you ever having kids?"

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Not only are these prints customizable, but they’re also a great way to slap your pet’s face all over your walls, bookshelves, and/or workspace. While some people put up framed photos of their family, you put up framed photos of your dog — and really, who’s the winner here? You, obviously, because this Etsy seller donates a portion of their sales to rescue organizations. #selfless

3. A wine glass that doubles as a life motto.

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What? I'm NOT technically alone.

4. A customized wine bottle for when you want Waffle to serve your wine.

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You’ve already got your dog wine glass, so now all you need is a customizable bottle with a picture of your dog looking at you like, “You had a ruff day. Finish the bottle.” Bonus points because 10% of the proceeds from Rescue Red Reserve (and White Reserve) is donated to rescue groups.

5. Coasters that inspire you to become your best self.

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People can learn a lot from dogs beyond just “unconditional love” and “how to pee on literally everything.” These coasters remind you of all that you can hope to be — and also that your dog has already achieved their goals because they’re the real MVP. 

6. A doormat that tells visitors that dogs are included in every activity in this house.  

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Doormats are unappreciated ways to show the world exactly what matters to you. For others, this doormat could feature a slice of pizza. For you, it features adorable dogs doing yoga so that everyone knows dogs are just as important as your health. 

7. A decal for your laptop, car, face, whatever.  

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There are tons of breed options for decals on Etsy, and even if you can’t find your dog’s exact breed, you can still show off how much you love dogs in general. This pug decal, for instance, screams “dog lover” and “judging you” in only the way that pug eyes can. Bonus points if you throw a collection of them on the back of your car like those family stickers.

8. A doggie duvet cover so that you’re never sleeping alone.

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You bring someone over for the first time, and things end up in the bedroom. You can gauge your compatibility by the way they react to this glorious cotton creation: if they question your interior decorating choices, send ‘em packing. If they say, “Oh my god, I bought the same one,” marry them. Marry them now.

9. A frame-shadow box hybrid to show how serious your love is.

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Print out one of the 4,739 pictures you have of Rufus on your phone, and give him the display he deserves. This adorable kit comes with a pet-friendly, non-toxic, air-drying clay to take an impression of your pup’s paw.  

10. Another T-shirt that speaks the truth.

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How else are you going to afford Duke’s gluten-free food, dog massages, and luxury dog house?

11. A sweater that says a dog-free zone is NOT somewhere you want to be.

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Wear this sweater and wordlessly walk away from any place that doesn't let you bring in your fuzzy child, Tink.

12. Some wear their heart on their sleeve — you chose your scarf.

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What better way to treat yo’ self than with a super awesome infinity scarf? This design features dachshunds, i.e. weiner dogs, i.e. hilarious little fluffer-nutters. It’s a conversation starter and a representation of what you love. It’s what the Fashion Gods would have wanted.

13. A shirt that is sassy for you.

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14. Bella might be wearing it, but be honest — this is a dog gift for you.

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A dog sweater haiku:

Some pups hate clothing.
Some pups love rocking sweaters.
All humans love dogs.

The end.

15. Show me a better image to wake up to. I’ll wait.

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For the Corgi/fluffybutt lover in your life. Drink coffee out of it or stare at it lovingly — the options are endless!

16. A custom throw pillow for your chic life.

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Throw pillows are one of those ways to make you look like you’ve got your life together — throw some on your couch or bed, and you’re basically Pinterest-glory. But don’t resort to buying any old throw pillow from Walmart like a peasant. Invest in something that defines just how amazing your dog truly is.

17. A mug that does not lie. 

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Want to experience nirvana? Sip from this mug, pet your dog’s head, and say nothing when people try to get you to do stuff. Attain maximum enlightenment. Break for belly rubs.

18. This book of slobber-tornadoes.

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Carli Davidson is an animal photographer, and she’s the one responsible for bringing the world amazing photos of dogs (and cats) in mid-shake. Her book Shake features all the adorable, floppy-faced images you could ever hope for — and there’s even one about puppies because the world is both just and good.

19. Classy cufflinks for the real world.

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Sometimes, you’re going to have to venture out into the world without your canine companion, and that totally sucks. But at least you can look super fly with these cufflinks, which also come in a variety of breed silhouettes!

20. This gift is just keepin’ it real.

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We love them, but not all of our black pants should look like furry leggings.

Related: Six Hacks Every Shedding Dog Owner Needs To Know 

21. Give a pooch a taste of the outside world.

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PetPeek Fence Window for pets is the perfect gift for dog lovers for two reasons:

  1. It’ll alleviate their guilt of having their curious pooch confined to their yard.
  2. It’s also a dog gift because they will LOVE getting to keep an eye on what’s going on!

22. Snuggle on up in this bed that will keep your pooch safe in the car.

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Nothing says “I love you” like a safety harness. Amirite? Okay, maybe not. But this pet car seat by Snoozer allows your dog-obsessed pal to safely bring Louie on road trips. 

It’s washable, it’s durable, and it can even reduce your pup’s carsickness since it allows them to look out the window. It includes a strap to connect your dog’s harness to the seat belt so that they stay put while you cruise around town.  

Dog Gifts

What kind of a monster would buy a dog-loving human a gift and not buy their furry counterpart a little present? A BIG ONE. That’s who. If you’re buying gifts for dog lovers, don’t forget to buy a dog gift for their best friend.

23. A treat jar that doubles as rustic kitchen decor.

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All your dog wants is more TREATS, and they need a container to keep ‘em fresh. As a bonus, this setup looks adorable on your countertop.

24. Hilarious toys that humiliate your lil’ monster.

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The best thing about novelty dog toys is that your dog literally doesn’t give a single shit that they’re running around with a mustache in their mouth — all they care about is the fact that it’s a toy. So, the benefit is twofold: your dog gets to play, and you get to send an excessive amount of photos to your friends of your dog playing with said toy because it’s hilarious. 

25. What, are they supposed to drink off the ground? Like an animal?

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Your four-legged hiking companion needs to be hydrated, and some people don’t like swapping slobber with their pup by sharing their Nalgene. This easy-to-slurp travel water bowl bottle solves that problem!

Related: Dehydration In Dogs Can Be Deadly: Here’s How To Keep Your Dog Cool

26. A personalized cookie cutter.

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Homemade dog treats are easy to make, and you can elevate yourself to Martha Stewart status (without the jail time) by using a personalized cookie cutter. Sure, your dog can’t read. But you can! And isn’t that enough?

Related: Homemade Dog Food Recipes: Easy, Healthy And Natural Dog Food In The Slow Cooker

27. Every hipster dog needs a flannel bandana.

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For the pup with a hipster dad who wouldn’t be caught dead at the dog park with an underdressed pooch.

28. A castle fit for your canine king or queen.

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Remember how much you loved building a fort or having a play house as a kid? Your pup deserves to have a secret hideaway, too! And it’s weatherproof so they can keep guard over their kingdom all year long. 

Related: You’ll Want To Live In This Luxury Dog House!

29. How stinking cute is this leash rack?

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A sweet spot to keep your pup’s leash, coat, sweater, scarf, and — if there’s room — maybe your keys.

30. The perfect dog gift for the pup who likes to practice their long jump over the fence.

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The Paw Tracker clips onto your pup’s collar and uses cell phone towers to upload their GPS coordinates to the Paw Tracker app. So the next time Donut runs down the block to chase a squirrel, you’ll be able to get them home in no time! 

31. The old-school way to find a lost pet. 

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If your furry child has a microchip and, God forbid, gets out of the yard — make sure whoever finds them knows that they can easily be returned home. And you wouldn’t buy your beloved a dog tag from some chain pet store, would you? You need something more sophisticated than that. 

32. The perfect holiday dog gift: a knit dog scarf!

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Great Dane or Toy Terrier, all pups could use a little extra warmth in the winter months. Bonus points for how freaking cute they look.

Have you received — or bought — the perfect gift for dog lovers? Share it with us in the comments ... so we can buy it for ourselves!